


The Things You Love Destroy You Everytime

by meleonon



Series: Dark Queen and her Dark Knight [1]
Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: F/M, Mad Queen Daenerys Targaryen, Mental Instability, Season 8 Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-10
Updated: 2019-08-10
Packaged: 2020-08-14 16:28:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20195242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meleonon/pseuds/meleonon
Summary: “I’ve finally taken what is rightfully mine. The Iron Throne. The Throne that Aegon the conqueror forged with the swords of his enemies.” Tilting her head back to look at the man who had been by her side since the beginning of it all, Daenerys shot Jorah a smile hoping he would come closer to her side and not stand so far away.





	The Things You Love Destroy You Everytime

**Author's Note:**

> Ok so this story wasn't supposed to go this way at all, but as I started writing it, it took on a mind of its own and did what it pleased.

Snow drifted through the holes in the ceiling of the Red Keep, flakes landing in her silver hair as she made her way to the thing she had been fighting to retake for years.

_It’s quite ugly_

Daenerys ran her fingers over the sharp edges of one of the swords that made up the Iron Throne as more snow

_ash_

settled on the cold steel.

Pulling her hand back to look at the bead of blood that welled up on her finger from where the Throne had cut her, the Dragon Queen furrowed her eyebrows.

_Fire and Blood_

Fire had rained down on King’s Landing, delivered through a single word from her to her child and with the blood of traitors, she had delivered freedom

_death_

to the innocents of King’s Landing from the tyrant queen, Cersei Lannister.

Echoes of the cheers

_fearful screams_

from below as Drogon blew his dragon fire upon the city sang to her as she liberated the people from tyranny and made her know that all she had suffered through had been worth it if she was able to free the masses.

Stepping away from her birthright as footsteps reverberated from behind her, Daenerys turned to face whoever it was.

He froze when she looked at him, looking unsure on whether he should approach her or stay where he was.

“Ser Jorah.” Daenerys said in greeting, a bright smile lighting up her face as she looked upon his weather beaten face, his expression worried and...something she had never seen on his face before.

_Fear?_

Fear that remained from the battle probably.

He had almost died protecting her on the Long Night all those nights ago at Winterfell.

Daenerys almost hadn’t let him come to King’s Landing to fight in this battle, he wasn’t fully healed from the near fatal wounds he had taken for her from the wights but he was insistent and stubborn in coming and she had relented after making him promise that he would come back to her after the battle ended.

She couldn’t let him die.

She needed him by her side when she ruled the Seven Kingdoms.

Daenerys had thought that Jon Snow would be by her side as well, but he had shown her that he no longer loved her.

She honestly wondered if he had ever truly loved her, surely learning that they were related wouldn’t have stopped him if he loved her but he rejected her time and time again.

“Your Grace...” Jorah said tentatively, shifting on his feet and clenching his hand on the pommel of his sword.

Meeting his gaze for a moment, she noticed the hesitancy in his posture...as if he wasn’t sure how she was going to react to his being there.

Daenerys spun around to face the Iron Throne, turning her back on the one man alive that she trusted with her life.

“I’ve finally taken what is rightfully mine. The Iron Throne. The Throne that Aegon the conqueror forged with the swords of his enemies.” Tilting her head back to look at the man who had been by her side since the beginning of it all, she shot him a smile hoping he would come closer to her side and not stand so far away.

Jorah looked like he wanted to say something, but the way his eyes darted from her to the throne betrayed his discomfort.

“Aegon Targaryen killed soldiers and innocents alike to unite the seven kingdoms and was named a Conqueror. King Aerys’ favorite way to execute people was with fire and was named a Mad king.” He paused, taking this moment to meet her violet gaze, his blue eyes betraying his emotions as he spoke to her like he always has.

“What will they name you?”

She hummed, turning her head from him to look at the throne and watch more snow (_ash)_ land on the cold steel.

“Queen Daenerys Targaryen the Savior perhaps?” Looking back at him with a cocked eyebrow and a proud smile on her face, a smile that fell when she saw the incredulous expression on his face.

“Savior?” He near scoffed, swallowing deeply as she turned to face him in confusion. She wasn’t sure why he stood so far away from her now, normally he was comfortable closing most of the distance between them to stand respectively nearby her, but now...now he stared at her from a distance in fear.

_Fear of...her?_

“Yes, a savior. I saved this city and all the kingdoms from the Mad Queen Cersei Lannister.” Daenerys told him, surprised that she needed to spell out the obvious to Jorah of all people. He wasn’t a dumb man, but she figured that he was still off kilter from his near death experience and his mind hadn’t quite recovered fully from it.

Jorah stared at her in silence for a long while, blinking his blue eyes at her before shaking his head with a breathy exhale.

“You truly believe that?”

Her eyes narrowed at him then and she watched him shift in discomfort.

“I do, because that is what I did Ser. I liberated this city. I liberated the entirety of Westeros from a tyrant.” She snapped at him, then reminded herself to try and reign in her temper with him.

He was still recovering after all. He wasn’t himself and surely he didn’t mean anything bad with his statement as he was known to sometimes make poor choices with choosing his words.

“You liberated it with Fire and Blood.” Jorah conceded, retaining the distance between them for some reason she couldn’t understand.

“They are my house words.” She said proudly, her eyes drifting up to the sky to see if she could catch a glimpse of her only remaining child.

“They surrendered...and you killed them all anyways.”

Dropping her gaze back to Jorah, she frowned and stepped closer to him.

“They backed the wrong queen and I couldn’t trust any of them, not after they killed Missandei and Rhaegal.” Her frown deepened when Jorah took a step back from her as she advanced, making her pause in surprise.

“Cersei, yes, I have no qualms about her dying. But what did the innocents of King’s Landing do to deserve death?” He questioned, his fist tightening on his sword in a way she knew tried to hide how tense he was, but she knew him so well that she noticed.

“No innocents died today my bear. Everyone who died today served the Mad Queen or fought for the rightful queen.” Daenerys explained to him, holding her hand out towards him in a hope that he would take it and they could return to normal.

Jorah eyed the proffered hand cautiously before slowly coming over to her and taking it in his own.

When he grabbed her hand in his, Daenerys felt the world shift back to where it should be and she smiled.

“Today marks the beginning of a new era. One where the common people aren’t pushed down by the rich and powerful.” Sliding her other hand into his, she looked into his eyes in a way that reminded her of their farewell on the shores of Dragonstone before he and the others had left to go north to the wall.

“Together, we will break the wheel that has tread upon the common people for generations.” Daenerys let her eyes flick down to his lips for a moment, the urge to lean forward and press hers to his hit her strongly.

He noticed where her gaze dropped to and he unconsciously leaned his head away from her.

“You were supposed to earn the love of the people and not become the queen of the ashes...what happened?” Jorah asked her quietly, the ocean of his eyes showing his confusion and it made her want to brush away the wrinkles of worry that lined his face.

“Silly bear, surely you know that it’s merely snowing. You’re from the north and I’ve heard it snows there quite often, so I’d figure that you of all people could be able to tell the difference.” Her silver hair fluttered around her head as she shook it slowly, resting one of her hands on his cheek and running her thumb over his coarse beard.

His eyes betrayed the heartbreak he felt, though she couldn’t figure out what had caused his pain.

They both turned to the door when it swung open again, Jorah instinctually moving Daenerys behind him slightly.

Jon Snow paused and looked at the two of them, his dark eyes darting between the Queen and her knight.

“Jon Snow.” Daenerys said much more coldly than she had when she greeted Jorah earlier.

Jon noticed the way Ser Jorah tensed up at his presence and held his sword hilt defensively and he knew then that he would have to get through the older knight to get to Daenerys.

Either that or convince him of Tyrion’s plan, which he felt was nigh impossible.

“Why?” He said simply, meeting her violet eyes in a plea for an answer.

“Why did you kill them all? Innocent women and children died because of you. For what reason!?” Jon’s voice was raising in frustration when she didn’t answer the first time.

“They surrendered and you killed them anyways!” Jon seemed to deflate, his eyes drifting over to Ser Jorah in a hope that the other man would back him.

Daenerys remained silent, her face blank as she stared at her ex-lover and nephew. It was as if she had locked herself into her mind and wasn’t understanding what Jon had said.

“Watch yourself Snow. You are talking to your queen.” Ser Jorah growled at the younger man, though the bite in his words sounded weary.

“And what is she a queen of now? People feared her and her beast before, now that they’ve seen what she just did...they won’t follow her.” Jon said even though he could see that Ser Jorah already knew that.

Jorah remained true to his Mormont ways and stayed silent, not having anything to add since Jon was right.

Daenerys had destroyed her chances at having Westeros love her the moment she set flame to the city.

“I liberated them Jon. I saved them from Cersei.” Daenerys spoke slowly, her tone blank and void of emotion.

“I saved them from themselves.”

Jon and Jorah shared a glance, their worry and fear for and of her written in their eyes.

“No, you massacred them Daenerys. Women, children...they’re all dead.” Jon talked to her quietly, afraid that if he spoke any louder he would snap something in her...something that hadn’t already snapped anyways.

She looked to him then, her eyes filling with a clarity that wasn’t there a few moments prior.

“No. No, there were only soldiers down there. I didn’t kill any innocents. I didn’t.” Daenerys rambled, shaking her head in a denial that was coming over her as her head cleared and the voices in her head began to fade away.

“You did though. Thousands of people died today that shouldn’t have and I still don’t understand **_why_**_._” Jon’s eyes widened as he watched her stumble backwards, her hands flying up to her cover her head as she let out a primeval scream that echoed through the crumbling building.

“Get out! Just get out of here! NOW!” Curling in on herself, she shot the most venom filled glare at Jon she could muster, watching as he stared at her for a moment, his hand coming to rest on a blade by his hip.

Jorah didn’t miss the movement and drew his sword, pointing the blade at the young man.

“Don’t even try. Leave before you do something stupid Snow.” Ser Jorah growled at him and he sounded so much like the Old Bear that it startled Jon as the resemblance between father and son surfaced.

Jon didn’t like to admit defeat, but seeing the way that Ser Jorah defended Daenerys he knew that he would have to kill the other man and he didn’t want to.

_‘It would be a poetic death for Ser Jorah’_ Jon thought as he turned around to leave the Dragon Queen and her Bear Knight _‘To be killed by his family sword given to me by his own father’_

Jorah watched Jon until he left the room completely before turning to look at Daenerys.

It broke his heart, seeing her so broken looking and listening to her groan as if she were in pain.

Walking over to her, he hesitated for a moment then reached out and placed his hand on her shoulder, nearly flinching back at the way her head snapped up to glare at him.

“I said get out!” She roared at him, making him take a step back, his eyes wide.

Recovering his wits, Jorah stood up straighter and shook his head.

“I’m not going anywhere.” He met her fury filled eyes, seeing the undertones of emotion underneath that showed her confusion and panic.

“Here I stand.”

The emotions in her eyes cycled around, from fury to sadness to amusement back to a deep melancholy and it made Jorah’s heart reach out for her in that moment.

Daenerys dropped her eyes to the floor in between them, her arms wrapped around her shoulders as if she were trying to make herself look smaller, like the shy, fearful girl Jorah had met all those years ago at her Dothraki wedding.

“What’s wrong with me Jorah?” Her voice was so quiet that if he hadn’t been listening closely enough, he would have missed her question.

Taking a chance, he closed the distance between them, resting his palm on her cheek and forcing her to look at him.

“There is nothing wrong with you Daenerys.” Her eyes searched his face for a sign that he was lying to her, but she found nothing and she sighed shudderingly.

Shoving his gentle touch away, she turned away from him and shook her head.

“I killed them Jorah. I don’t even know _why_.” She breathed out in a sob, the world becoming more and more blurry as she spoke to her oldest and dearest friend.

“I heard the bells ring and then...it was as if...as if this uncontrollable **fury** came over me and these...voices started telling me to _‘Burn them all. Kill them all. Burn them all. Burn them all. Burn them all.’._” She couldn’t bring herself to look at him as she began to realize the enormity of what she had done.

He would hate her, of that she had no doubt.

How could he still love a monster like her?

_‘So much for my gentle heart, eh Jorah?’_

Daenerys wasn’t expecting him to close the distance and embrace her tightly.

With a choked sob, she returned the embrace and buried her face into his chest.

“Why don’t you hate me?” He could barely hear her mumbled words as they were spoken into his breastplate.

“How could you even ask me that?” Jorah was stunned that she thought that he would hate her after her brief lapse. “I wasn’t lying to you when I told you I loved you. That I’ll always love you.”

Raising her head up so she could meet his blue eyes, she looked at him in awe, silently wondering how this man could be real.

They stood there in silence for a while, Daenerys content in Jorah’s arms as she formulated what she wanted to say to him.

“Jon was going to try and kill me, wasn’t he?” She settled with, though it was far from what she truly wanted to say.

Jorah hummed, his eyes dropping from hers for a moment before meeting her red brimmed violet gaze.

“Aye. I think he was. He wasn’t expecting me to be here and it forced him to change his plans.” Jorah eventually told her, though she already knew and it hurt her heart knowing that Jon was so willing to kill her after one small mistake.

Jorah could see the pain in her eyes and he hated nothing more than seeing the woman he loved unhappy.

After all, he had sold men into slavery to try and make his second wife happy and he would do that and more to see Daenerys happy again.

_‘The things you love, destroy you every time’_

There was wisdom in the words his father had told him decades ago, but even now, Jorah found that he was willing to destroy himself for love time and time again.

“I won’t let anyone hurt you Khaleesi.” He told her firmly and surely, urging a soft smile onto her pretty face.

“I know you won’t Ser. You’ve always been my protector, my knight and you’ve proved yourself to me a hundred times over.” Her tears were drying up as she ran her hand over his cheek like she had done countless times before.

Letting her hand drop down to rest on his chest, she stared at her tiny hand on his large frame as she snorted.

“You’ve remained by my side even as I chose to bed other men, all but ignoring you as a potential lover.” Her eyebrows furrowed as she spoke and her eyes slipped shut when she felt him press a gentle kiss to her brow.

“All I wanted was for you to be happy.” He said, making her look up and meet his gaze curiously.

“And if being in other men’s arms is what made you happy...then who was I to try and get in the way?”

Daenerys shook her head in bemusement, Jorah was the most selfless, selfish man she had ever met and she knew that she would be a fool to not use it to her advantage.

“I will not ignore you any longer Ser.” His stunned expression made her smile.

“W-What do you mean Your Grace?” He tried to create some distance between them, but she wouldn’t let him.

“I need to tell you something.” Her quick change in conversation had him slightly reeling, but he nodded anyways.

“Jon Snow is the true heir to the Iron Throne. He is the legitimate child of Rhaegar and Lyanna Stark.”

This information sent a shock through Jorah’s gut and he had a hard time believing it, but the more he thought about it, the more it made sense.

“Who knows?”

She growled in annoyance, not with him he figured, but with Jon.

“Jon and myself obviously. Samwell Tarly and Bran Stark figured it out and told Jon. Jon told Sansa and Arya. Sansa told Tyrion and he told Varys...who I executed for treason. And now you.” She informed him and he hummed thoughtfully.

“Sansa will want Jon on the throne. She doesn’t like me and will do anything in her power to make sure I don’t get the throne.” Daenerys planted the seed in his head and waited to begin watering it to her liking.

“Does Jon even want the throne?” He asked, though he felt he knew the answer.

“He says he doesn’t, but he might not have a choice if people start backing him and urging him to take it.” Daenerys affirmed his suspicion and he tightened his hold on her slightly.

“If he abdicates the throne to you in front of everyone, they’ll have no choice but to accept it.” Jorah suggested, but it wasn’t enough for her.

“There will still be those that prefer Jon on the throne and the seeds of rebellion will always be growing.” Adding a healthy dose of water and paranoia to the seed she planted in his head, she met his gaze.

“The only way to ensure my seat on the throne is if Jon is dead.” She put out in the open and the look on his face told her of his unease garnered from her implication.

“Aye, I suppose that is true.” He conceded slowly as if he didn’t like where she was heading with this.

Wrapping her arms around his neck, she ran her fingers through his hair and teased him by running her lips over his cheek, pausing when they were close to his.

“You’ll kill him for me?”

Implications gone, she felt the breath leave his body as he trembled.

Their eyes locked onto one another’s and she could see the distress and reluctance in his gaze.

He swallowed audibly, shutting his eyes with a deep sigh before opening them and meeting her violet eyes with a fierce determination that Daenerys was more than familiar with.

“There’s nothing I would deny you my Queen.” He acquiesced and she grinned widely at him, finally pressing her lips to his in a violent kiss that he returned in equal force, his hands coming to grip her braided hair so he could tilt her head back and deepen it.

Mad Queen Daenerys, Targaryen Tyrant.

The people of Westeros could call her what they wanted, she didn’t care, not anymore.

Westeros didn’t love her, they hadn’t loved her from the moment she stepped onshore, so why should she show Westeros her gentle heart and love?

There was only one Westerosi that would ever get her love, the rest she would rule over with Fire and Blood.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed it, like I said before, it wasn't supposed to go this way at all, but I kind of like how it turned out, even if it is much darker than I originally planned.


End file.
